Brotherhood
17. My brother left for San Diego. I was all alone again, but I always know any minute or hour, when I’m feeling in pain, my brother finds a way to come see me!
16. I was trying to do well in school because I didn’t want to fuck up, my brother always listens to me!
15. I was ditching school because school wasn’t for me. I was hanging out with the homies up to nothing good, but my brother found me and took me home!
14. Starting high school was all new to me, plus I found all the ways to get in trouble. I didn’t give a sh__ but my brother gave me advice saying, “You’re better than that.”
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10. The move from Lennox to Inglewood, it wasn’t easy because I had all my friends in Lennox and now I was going to a new school. My brother took me because my dad wasn’t around and my mother wasn’t either.
9. When my foster dad was beating up on my foster mom, I ran up to him and pushed him away. My brother came and took me outside because my brother was about to kick his butt!
8. I was shooting hoops outside in the driveway. My brother came outside to play with me because I was always alone. I had a deep, cold heart but my brother always made everything all right!
7. When they took me away from my mom, they put me in foster care, but they took four of us in the same home. Lucky I had my “brothers and sisters.” I was sad because I was all alone, but my brother, Angel, just told me, “Never lose hope. One day everything will be all right!”
6. I was getting picked on because I was obese. I cried. I did something about it. My brother worked out with me and said, “A quitter won’t get anything in life but if you really want it, never let up!”
5. When I was on the streets, getting beat up because they pushed my sister, and she was crying, my brother came and they ran away!
4. When I was getting picked on at school, my brother told them to lay off. My brother was like a father for me!
3. I remember that I was afraid of the dark, but my brother was right beside me, fighting my demons on the spot!
2. My brother took care of me when my mom was at work.
1. I was born. All I can see is my mom and brother because my father wasn’t around.
0. I’m thankful for my brother taking the place of my father! I know it’s not easy to fill those shoes.
A Dream Comes a Long Way
I think of myself as a dreamer.
It started when I was in fifth grade.
I had no one to lean on. Every day I was picked on because I was fat. Kids called me Jelly Roll Toe, Fatty, and Etc. I wore the same clothes for weeks because I didn’t have a lot. I was roaming the street with my friends, hopeless with no one to turn to.
But every night I dreamed that I would become somebody.
Every day was a battle because I didn’t know where I was headed.
I lay in bed and dreamed of a better life. I always questioned myself.
“Is this life really for me?”
“Is there another way out of the ‘hood?”
I dreamed of having a father who would teach me how to grow as a man; how to shave; how to write and how to earn respect.
I woke.
It was all a dream. I knew it wasn’t true. I wish it was true.
Now I know only I can carve out my own future. I need to stay on the straight and narrow road. Even though I may stumble and fall occasionally.
It is not in my blood to give up. All my dreams will come true if I do something about them. I will learn to become a man on my own.
All those years I felt empty, like something was missing.
But I found writing.
Writing’s helped keep me on track. Writing’s helped me understand that my past can’t hurt me anymore.
A dream made me come a long way from my past to this present moment.
I have always been alone searching for a father
I have always been alone searching for a father, but it never happened.
Every night and day I have been praying to see him.
I have been crying for so long.
I was lost in the world, doing drugs, joining a gang, just looking for a father figure.
He fades away.
I learned things the hard way, by seeing my mom working so hard to give my brothers, sisters and me a bite to eat every day.
Every night I listen to my mom cry.
I felt bad because I thought it was my fault he left.
When I saw him in jail, he said, “Sorry.”
But I didn’t listen to him. I was so mad I couldn’t forgive him because he wasn’t there when I needed him.
But I learned to keep my head up and how to forgive my father.
I thank God for changing my life. Without God in my life, I would be lost
